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About Varied / Hobbyist Steven StowellMale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 1 Year
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Statistics 177 Deviations 147 Comments 2,805 Pageviews
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Critiques

by QAoA

Now this I can critique seeing as it has human's. This is a beautiful piece of art. The stain glass window is symbolic and a nice touch...

Newest Deviations

Literature
Reflecting on Things
    Vernacular used to by my specialty,
but it feels like that is no longer my reality.
    I used to write glorious tales of heroes and villains with pictures to show,
whether or not I still have that skill I just don't know...
    I turned my tongue to poetry and rhyme,
encountering the feeling that venting was a crime.
    Depression crept in like a demon that waited at my doorstep,
when it sunk in I did my best to keep in step...
    Slowly I turned again, to song,
yet my every action still set wrong...
    I made myself a promise,
and I am a man of my world.
    I know life cannot possibly be a breeze,
but one day I am determined to sing of my own trees.
    I've grown into a different man,
brighter future, better lyrics, better plan.
    And I won't stop no matter what hate,
I'm sorry critics but you are too late.
    I will sing what I please,
and my mind shall rest at ease.
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 1 0
Literature
Flipside
    I feel so alive.
I'm dead and dying inside.
    I'm so happy.
I'm brutally depressed.
    I love seeing my friends day to day.
I just want to die.
    You can trust me.
Until it gets to the point where I tell you why I hate myself and accidentally bug you about it till you agree.
    I like friendship.
I'm better off alone in the darkness.
    Life is easy.
Life is one of the hardest things for any human being, it's a uphill fight through and through, and quitting isn't winning... but... I'm so tired of fighting.
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 0 0
Literature
''I Dunno'' Song... sorta
Maybe I can write a song
With nothing going on,
Inside my head,
Who was the guy who said,
Faith was dead?
(Chorus I guess)
I dunno what I’m doing with this song,
Inside my head I got nothing going on.
It’s too hot to think,
So much heat I’m leaking like a vintage sink.
Will anyone even hear this,
Why would I perform this?
I don’t know why I’m writing now,
Maybe you can tell me how,
People are supposed to function in the heat,
Get’s warmer in the summer ain't that neat?
That was sarcastic if you didn’t catch it,
God help this generation if this winds up being a hit.
I’ve had toilet thoughts long expired,
That were more inspired.
(chorus)
Guess I should write up a bridge now,
I really don’t see how,
You’re taking this seriously,
If you're listening -c’mon really?
Fun fact about the rhyme scheme here,
I’m writing two line rhymes just incase you care.
I don’t have a headache so thank you tylenol,
But my brain is
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 0 0
Literature
Self Challenge: Short Song With Song Structure
I look outside to see the sun,
I could go outside and have fun.
But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.
I wanna be free,
I wanna be me.
But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.
Maybe I could break away and fly,
but I just wanna curl up and cry.
But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.
But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.
Broken I crawl,
because I was allowed to fall...
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 2 0
Literature
An Informal Formal Thank You
    To everyone who ever hurt me,
to everyone who has made my blood boil.
    To everyone who has ever scorned me,
or thrown my life into turmoil.
    To everyone who has ever hated me,
to those who's patience with me did spoil.
    All I can say is,
thank you.
    You'd think I hate you,
you'd think I'm angry.
    You'd think I resent you,
you'd think you're my enemy.
    You'd think I never want to speak to you,
you'd think you've ruined me.
    All I can say is,
thank you.
    You who brought about the winter wars,
you who I went crazy for.
    You who left me heartbroken,
whom I fear I hurt even more.
    You who I have to thank for the depression,
you who left me in the dark.
    All I can say is,
thank you.
    My mind is a cesspool of violence,
so I drain it into my composition note books.
    I have become afraid of the silence,
and I give
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 3 3
Literature
More
    The moon and back aren't far enough,
nor the ends of the earth,
or the edge of the universe,
I love you more.
    I wouldn't kill for you,
I'd exterminate mankind for you.
I wouldn't die for you,
I'd die a thousand times to spare you the least of pain.
    I won't love you till death do us part,
I won't love you forever and always,
I won't love you in sickness and in health,
I'll love you more.
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 0 1
Literature
(Another) Unexpected Development
    A year ago I gave a girl my heart,
then a tragedy struck and tore it all apart.
    I was left stranded in the desolate wastes of my own psyche,
and it felt like there was no hope for me.
    I had found a second girl to hold,
but in the end I was left to freeze in the cold.
    A darkness set into the hole in my soul,
and it felt like it would never be made whole.
    I saw my pain bleeding through,
made the pain bleed true...
    Wrote lyrics and poetry sometimes intended to actually scare the listener,
but I always felt like a complete failure.
    But if only I had known what was in store,
that God had so much more.
    My goals realized and words spoken,
I -I am no longer broken.
    Time did do me harm,
but truly -third times the charm.
    Fear inspires,
but it does not have to win.
    Not now,
not ever.
    Adding secret fourth verses is what I do,
God my
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 2 2
Mature content
Cope :iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 1 0
Literature
Veteran of Inner Wars
    My mind is a battlefield,
my emotions soldiers.
    Love against hate,
hope against fear.
    Logic against rage,
good against evil.
    Optimist against cynic,
me against myself.
    God against sin,
my soul against Satan.
    It's to a point where I speak in metaphor,
Abyss' and bleeding yet neither mean what they should.
    I tried not to fight anymore,
but clearly it did no good.
    Someone took my cross from my shoulders and rammed it through my heart,
and it has bleed ever since that day.
    I live a paradox,
wanting death whilst simultaneously fearing it so early.
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 2 0
Literature
Some Heartfelt Excerpts
    "If you give up on fighting the pain,
then silence will remain.
    Your room will be a hollow hallow,
and tears will follow."
"Where did I go Wrong?"
"What Did I do wrong?"
    "Because in your absence,
there is only silence.
    Your brothers and your sisters will look up to the sky,
asking, "Dear God why?"
    Because in your absence,
there is only silence."
    "If only you could here them now,
crying as they ask how,
you could take your life away,
if only we knew -we'd be there with you everyday."
    "Because in your absence,
there is only silence."
    "There is only,
the GOD FORSAKEN SILENCE!
    There is only,
SOMEONE END THE SILENCE!
    There is only,
GOD DAMN THIS UNTIMELY SILENCE!
    You're a generation,
leaving so much silence.
    Dear God,
please end the silence!
    Dear God,
please end the silence!"
    "Because   in
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 4 0
Literature
One Day
One day.
    One day can break a heart,
one day can start a relationship.
    One day can kill a man,
one day can save him.
    One day can break a man,
one day can mend him.
    One day can ruin a life,
one day can fix it.
    One day can destroy a soul,
one day can save it.
    One day can hurt,
one day can please.
    One day can scream,
one day can whisper.
    One day can be my last,
one day...
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 4 0
Mature content
Somber Brithday :iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 3 0
Literature
Goodbye!!! Prompt
    Goodbye to the year that left me in pain!
Goodbye to the days that drove me insane!
    I fell for an angel that heaven did forbid,
and I was wounded for what I did.
    But while love left me hollow,
God's grace did follow.
    I may have been so badly tortured that I begged you for my execution,
but now I know I cannot be hurt worse.
    And whilst all I have left is a voice constantly singing my downfall,
I know there are people to whom I can always call.
    Perhaps the sun is not bright enough to extinguish the darkness in my soul,
but we were never made to simultaneously stand alone and stand whole.
    I question if this self-destructive nature is perhaps just indicative of the inevitable,
but I know the damage in my soul is not irreparable.
    Whilst I failed to find my place in the diary of Jane as anything more than a beast,
I know I miss that life the least.
    You see by removing
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 1 0
Literature
On the Topic of Bones
    We're all the same,
once you peel back the skin.
    When you brake us down to our frame,
that's where the similarities begin.
    Remember,
we're all smiling on the inside.
    January to December,
our skull and jaw form a smile, even if behind a frown it will hide.
    Bone,
the slowest to decay.
    No matter how long we're gone,
in the ground, our bones will stay.
    Some people have skeletons in their closet,
mine are just under my flesh and wrapped in veins.
:iconLonejedi100:Lonejedi100
:iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 1 0
Mature content
For what I did... what I wanted... what I said... :iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 0 0
Two Hands, One Gun by Lonejedi100
Mature content
Two Hands, One Gun :iconlonejedi100:Lonejedi100 0 0

Favourites

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Literature
A Person's Feelings (F)
Her kindness forces you to immolate your needs and other’s lives.
You get baffled by her sweet words. Get lost in her sea of eyes.
Perfection in existence, and she's the best thing ever around.
You’re not aware of the time; you lose focus, the time slows down
She is the sailor to my ship, and an immaculate seaman.
The synonym of benevolence. She’s the Garden of Eden.
She praised me like no other. She brought my pain to an end.
She is the divinity of kindness, and a perfect sweet friend.
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Literature
Six Words Rhymes
Left ‘em alone… A horrible choice.
“Wrong number,” says a familiar voice.
Bad response left him in tears
“Sorry soldier, shoes sold in pairs”
A sorrow sight of tears unleashed.
Man cries holding his dog’s leash.
Had a brother, felt quite wild.
Born a twin; graduated only child.
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Literature
Six Words Rhymes 2
Great timing. There is no witness.
Regretted it. Shouldn't had cut wrists.
On Top. Good moment to avail.
Paralyzed for life. A Suicide fail.
Pondering about loneliness. Thought he’s alone.
Family died in a burnt home.
Achieved his goals. This is fate.
Suicidal arsonist… burnt at the stake.
Suicidal carnivore. His life wasn’t fun.
Didn’t like vegetables, but became one.
Went flying. Plane debris. Laying underneath.
Can’t see. She’ll die. Can’t breathe.
Personal
Never asked opinions. Don’t rate me.
Just keep away if you hate me.
You need to die. Slowly die.
I changed. No More Mr.Nice Guy.
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Mature content
Broken Mirror :iconmrskittlesxd:MrSkittlesXD 2 2
Tusken Warlords by Kyber02 Tusken Warlords :iconkyber02:Kyber02 27 0
Literature
Suicidal
It's very difficult
to be suicidal
and still want to live.
I'm in no danger,
I won't do it,
but the thoughts always linger.
"It'll be easier when you're dead."
"It'll be better when you're dead."
"You won't have to worry any more."
"No matter what the afterlife holds,
it really can't be bad."
Sometimes, it's even
"I'm so excited for the day I die."
The thought can be
exhilarating.
It can also be scary.
It can be sad.
it can be fun.
Yet
life, this life, I do enjoy my life.
I'm happy.
Happy enough sometimes.
Very happy other times.
And even when I'm not,
even when I'm unhappy,
I know things will get better.
I have things to live for,
I know that I do.
I have love, so much love.
I don't want to leave it.
The future.
But despite all that,
I still can't rid myself of the thoughts.
Even when it's easy,
Even when I'm at my best.
Even when I'm happiest,
It will always be there,
scratching at the back of my neck,
Tingling
like the thought of
a bullet to the brain,
it feels so good.
We get stron
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Literature
We Got Lost That Night, Remember?
We Got Lost That Night, Remember?
"Will you guide me home tonight?"
The words echo in my mind
That lonely smile gave up the fight
Willingly leaving me behind
The silvery glow against the sky
Waving at me, saying goodbye
I cannot guide you in this rain
You're shivering with cold
No bonfire can ease your pain
I knew the tragedy would unfold
The silent bells in the wind call you
The ethereal you, who's not true
Fog's embracing us from every side
Yet you let go of my hand
I know all the secrets you try to hide
Just allow me to understand
The moon longingly calls your name
And you... you became its claim
"Will you let me cry tonight?"
I ask the wind passing by
My sorrow betrayed by starlight
As I watch your soul fly
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Literature
Wronging Finger
A failed friendship
that I couldn’t keep.
An alienation
by my own coalition.
A knife in my back
placed by my own man.
Who’s to blame?
Who should I name?
Is it he? Is it she?
Or is it me?
I beg of you
if it’s the last thing I do.
I’ve asked for so long,
What did I do wrong?
:iconWindMeister8:WindMeister8
:iconwindmeister8:WindMeister8 32 34
Journal
Holiday Card Project 2016!

The DeviantArt #HolidayCardProject is back for its 10th year!  With the goal of bringing a bit of holiday cheer to patients in the hospital during the holiday season, the Holiday Card Project connects artists from around the world, applying their tremendous artistic abilities to designing and creating uplifting holiday cards.
In the past few years, this project has received more than 5,000 cards sent in by more than 2,000 deviants from 60 different countries/political regions. Cards are then divvied up and distributed by DeviantArt members to local Los Angeles hospitals, with additional cards given to various hospitals in the U.S. and abroad for DeviantArt volunteers and hospital staff members to hand out to patients.
The idea behind the Holiday
:iconmadizzlee:madizzlee
:iconmadizzlee:madizzlee 1,701 2,062
Literature
Questions for the Troubled
Do you hate yourself as an artist?
Do you hate yourself as a writer?
Do you hate yourself as a person?
If so, why?
Why do you despise what you made?
Why do you loathe what you've written?
Why do you regret being human?
Then let me ask you this:
What good is any of it doing you?
Is it helping you progress to a better future as a creative mind?
Will holding on to those lingering dark emotions benefit in any way?
Unto you, I say:
Let it go. Forgive yourself. Love yourself and those around you.
If the darkness holds, then channel it. Do not bottle it in.
Pay no heed to the world; it does not revolve around you.
Let the masses tend to their business and let not their opinions concern you.
Draw for yourself. Write for yourself. Become better for yourself. Then if not for yourself, then for someone you hold dear.
It is all I ask.
:iconKaijuX:KaijuX
:iconkaijux:KaijuX 8 16

Groups

Activity


    Vernacular used to by my specialty,
but it feels like that is no longer my reality.
    I used to write glorious tales of heroes and villains with pictures to show,
whether or not I still have that skill I just don't know...
    I turned my tongue to poetry and rhyme,
encountering the feeling that venting was a crime.
    Depression crept in like a demon that waited at my doorstep,
when it sunk in I did my best to keep in step...
    Slowly I turned again, to song,
yet my every action still set wrong...
    I made myself a promise,
and I am a man of my world.
    I know life cannot possibly be a breeze,
but one day I am determined to sing of my own trees.
    I've grown into a different man,
brighter future, better lyrics, better plan.
    And I won't stop no matter what hate,
I'm sorry critics but you are too late.
    I will sing what I please,
and my mind shall rest at ease.
    Because fear inspires,
but I'll be damned if I let it win.
Reflecting on Things
I probably wont be doing much on here at least for a good stretch, though you probably already knew that, so sorry for that if you enjoy my content, most of my focus has been pooled into writing music.
Loading...
    I feel so alive.
I'm dead and dying inside.
    I'm so happy.
I'm brutally depressed.
    I love seeing my friends day to day.
I just want to die.
    You can trust me.
Until it gets to the point where I tell you why I hate myself and accidentally bug you about it till you agree.
    I like friendship.
I'm better off alone in the darkness.
    Life is easy.
Life is one of the hardest things for any human being, it's a uphill fight through and through, and quitting isn't winning... but... I'm so tired of fighting.
Flipside
Sorry. I know, I'm all over the place with the tone of my content...
Loading...
Maybe I can write a song
With nothing going on,
Inside my head,
Who was the guy who said,
Faith was dead?

(Chorus I guess)
I dunno what I’m doing with this song,
Inside my head I got nothing going on.
It’s too hot to think,
So much heat I’m leaking like a vintage sink.
Will anyone even hear this,
Why would I perform this?

I don’t know why I’m writing now,
Maybe you can tell me how,
People are supposed to function in the heat,
Get’s warmer in the summer ain't that neat?
That was sarcastic if you didn’t catch it,
God help this generation if this winds up being a hit.
I’ve had toilet thoughts long expired,
That were more inspired.

(chorus)

Guess I should write up a bridge now,
I really don’t see how,
You’re taking this seriously,
If you're listening -c’mon really?
Fun fact about the rhyme scheme here,
I’m writing two line rhymes just incase you care.
I don’t have a headache so thank you tylenol,
But my brain is still fried and all.
Can’t believe I figured out how to rhyme that one,
Okay, sorry, now the chorus is done.

(chorus)

Who’s idea was this anyway?
Why am I asking no one’s gonna tell me.
Yes I rhymed that by changing the pronunciation,
At least my songs have punctuation...
I look outside to see the sun,
I could go outside and have fun.

But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.

I wanna be free,
I wanna be me.

But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.

Maybe I could break away and fly,
but I just wanna curl up and cry.


But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.


But I'm held back by my heart,
because it's falling apart.

Broken I crawl,
because I was allowed to fall...
Self Challenge: Short Song With Song Structure
Yikes... sorry guess I decided to write this at a bad time... But hey it's the shortest song that follows my most used song structure
Loading...
    To everyone who ever hurt me,
to everyone who has made my blood boil.
    To everyone who has ever scorned me,
or thrown my life into turmoil.
    To everyone who has ever hated me,
to those who's patience with me did spoil.
    All I can say is,
thank you.

    You'd think I hate you,
you'd think I'm angry.
    You'd think I resent you,
you'd think you're my enemy.
    You'd think I never want to speak to you,
you'd think you've ruined me.
    All I can say is,
thank you.

    You who brought about the winter wars,
you who I went crazy for.
    You who left me heartbroken,
whom I fear I hurt even more.
    You who I have to thank for the depression,
you who left me in the dark.
    All I can say is,
thank you.

    My mind is a cesspool of violence,
so I drain it into my composition note books.
    I have become afraid of the silence,
and I give you terrified looks.
    When feelings are immense,
my heart is splayed across the songbooks.
    All I can say is,
thank you.

    One day my music shall help people like me,
who are heartbroken and lost.
    And I couldn't have done that without you, you see,
it was worth the emotional cost.
    I found true love I thought could never be,
and even if the winter will never fully defrost:
    All I can say is,
thank you.

deviantID

Lonejedi100's Profile Picture
Lonejedi100
Steven Stowell
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
I have a Youtube. I draw, write, and direct. Also I do see all the fav's and llama badges guys and gals and they are appreciated thank you (just putting this here because I gave up on trying to always comment, "thanks for the fav").
Interests

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconanimallover670:
AnimalLover670 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Happy birthday!
Reply
:iconlonejedi100:
Lonejedi100 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks :)
Reply
:iconmrskittlesxd:
MrSkittlesXD Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Congratulations, dude! Your poem was featured on "Word of Chen". Proud of you, bud.
Reply
:iconlonejedi100:
Lonejedi100 Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks, I'm a member with them and I submit my stuff all the time, at lunch today I saw the video, lol if only I hadn't made that typo of glace instead of glance.
Reply
:iconkaijux:
KaijuX Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the favorite. :)
Reply
:iconlonejedi100:
Lonejedi100 Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
your welcome, it was a good piece
Reply
:iconprudencewry:
PrudenceWry Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2016
Thanks for watching :)
Reply
:iconlonejedi100:
Lonejedi100 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Not a problem :)
Reply
:iconmagmawolfksshq:
MagmaWolfKsshq Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the Fav :heart:
Reply
:iconlonejedi100:
Lonejedi100 Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
no problem, you deserved it :) (Smile) 
Reply
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